Huffington Post Break Up Letter

April 28, 2016

It’s not you, it’s me. Yeah, it’s you.

Well Huffington Post, it’s been real, but it’s time for us to break up.

There is so much going on in the world and your writers are writing about the “lie” that is baby carrots. Does ANYONE believe they are grown perfectly and peeled from the ground? Have you ever had fresh fruit or veggies before? You couldn’t have, if you believe the baby carrot “lie”. There are no two strawberries the same, tomatoes the same, potatoes the same, or even carrots that grow exactly the same as one another from the ground. So, if you are buying these little perfectly formed veggies and thinking they are grown that way, we need to have a serious talk about where your food comes from.

Even Good Morning America wrote about a chimpanzee that escaped from the zoo. Another story on my newsfeed was about an 85-year-old war veteran who is learning to dance, and others writing about the effects diet soda has on your body. All are more interesting and better to write about than something that should be COMPLETELY common sense like baby carrots.

I’ve been on the fence about our relationship for a while now, and baby carrots are the straw that broke the camel’s back. (For you people that believed the baby carrot “lie”, this is just a metaphor. I didn’t actually break a camel’s back.) So while it’s been real Huffington Post, this is goodbye. Maybe one day we can be friends again but it will have to be after the election, as that and baby carrots seem to be your inspiration as of late.

Bye, Felicia.